Drinking More Water

It’s just after 12pm. To my left of the new Macbook Pro I purchased is a large bottle of Essentia water. Water is what humans are partially made of and most of us in the age of sugar soft drinks barely consume any of the natural resource that creates the sugar soft drinks we crave in first place. The fight for my life, my battle against my own morbid obesity, can be boosted greatly by actually drinking more of it.

My resistance to consuming water is that by large the consumption of sugar makes one find the average glass of water to be – well, bland. Granted, the water we drink in our modern times has been filtered of any of original flavor and we as a society perhaps never get a chance to consistently know what real water tastes like. It would be interesting to find out if what company that sells water bottles actually sells them with real water.

I imagine that people trapped in a horrible prison in a different country with the option of drinking only Tab or Jolt or some other off-brand sugar drink would settle for dying in the act of gaining their freedom than torture themselves with what in reality is “fake water”. This is a revelation! I have invented a spin-off of the words “Fake News” and have created “Fake Water”. I’m not exactly sure this would trend on social media and I’m not too sure I wanna take the chance of finding out which side of the reactionary spectrum I end up on in this world wide web of ours.

My god, I really am dating myself by saying the words “world wide web”. Those three words are about as old as “information superhighway”, “interwebs” and “America Online”. I miss America Online for some random reason.

Maybe I’ll buy a CD on eBay and keep it as a coaster to occasionally remind myself that a thing called dial-up actually existed at one time.

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