Author Archives: Matthew Milam

The Right To Ask Questions

John Grisham apparently unleashed his foot-in-mouth personality on a matter best left to that guy who does To Catch A Predator. I personally don’t get the outrage: people like him exist all of this world and are not famous, nor are they given platforms wide enough to even get headlines for saying such mind-boggling crap. Since he has unleashed his opinion for the media to toil over, outraged are we as a nation once again.

On Twitter, before I was aware of why his name was being mentioned today, I discovered that Mr. Grisham a long time ago refused to let Will Smith be cast in a movie adaptation to one of his novels. I asked the person who brought this up why and was told to go Google it. I’m not against going to Google anything, but I like to interact and learn something (or re-learn in this case) from other people and not a search index. To suggest with a tinge of anger that I need to go Google the information strikes me as weird; Questions are a part of how the world finds answers, if there were no questions the world would have fewer answers.

I’ve been asked some questions that would be classified as “stupid” as if everyone is supposed to have the answer built into their head. I don’t get mad, become a smart-ass, or via the Internet send links to sites like I don’t have the time to give an elaborate answer. I’d rather tell you, show you and get you to understand rather than assume you won’t at all.

Helping others, however stupid it may be, showcases how you treat a person. I know the logic that helping everyone can leave no time for yourself is popular these days, but there’s always space for someone else and yourself equally. I mean, who wants to exist in this world totally separated from everything.

You Own Nobody

I witnessed towards the end of the summer something I never thought I’d witness in life: a public shaming on Facebook of someone I knew. Personal intimate photos and videos this person took were put into a YouTube video called “Insert name here is a bitch”. The video itself was short, but the damage was great. To make matters worse, it happened because one person decided that another person was not worth dealing with.

Before the video was posted on Facebook and YouTube, a series of text messages were sent from the individual who created the video constantly threatening the release of said video. For this person to not feel the wrath of the other, this said person would have to be the other’s lover and show up at a designated location on certain days every other week. Correct me if I’m wrong, but love does not come with an enslavement clause.

You can keep in a marriage or just your regular ordinary relationship, but let’s be clear: You Own Nobody. If someone wants to come into your life, it’s because they want to. Getting a relationship through force or manipulation does not a relationship make. To think this way is not to know love, or even respect for another human being.